I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Randomize
