Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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