Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
