Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
