East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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