Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
