Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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