weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
