You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I have tasted many bathrooms
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
