What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
You may now shotgun with the bride
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
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