how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
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as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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