It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
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