i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
