I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
