4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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