She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
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