Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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