I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Someone signed my nipple.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize