This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
