what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize