I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
