the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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