We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
my poor anus
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
