But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
The ass gains better be worth it
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