Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I can text with my tongue
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
