we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
