Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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