i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
