its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
