Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize