haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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