another moral hangover. fuck.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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