Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Randomize
