I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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