you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
