Duck Duck Cougar?
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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