he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
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