i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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