never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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