Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You are the jesus of drinking
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
