Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
