lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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