Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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