My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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