are you still at the devil's house?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
