Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize