We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
