my room smells like sperm. sweet.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
