plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
