quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
