32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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